The Night That Was Magical. :)

Imogen Heap Live @ Hard Rock Cafe, 22rd November 2011. 
And it happened, The goddess came on stage, played for us, entertained us, blew us away. Imogen Heap is one of the best singers out there and she can play almost every fucking instrument in this world. She is truly exceptional. After the dissappointment of Metallica, this really made up for everything. OMFG! What a gig it was! MAN! Best night ever. The most magical night ever. It just reached another level. Her aura was just, different. 


I heard about Imogen Heap the first time on the Star World series The Dewarists when she collaborated with Vishal/Shekhar and made the song "Minds Without Fear" and that was when I just plunged into her music. Her voice just drawed me towards her music. Then my friends told me about songs like Hide And Seek and Speeding Cars and Let Go and all stuff. I downloaded the discography and started listening to her music every night, ESPECIALLY Hide and Seek - a minimum of 15 hits a day. After sometime, I hear news about her performing at Hard Rock. I WENT MENTALL! I was like I NEED TO WATCH THIS! I DONT CARE! I told my parents about it, make them listen to her and they agreed to make me for the gig. Imogen is just amazing! She's the most spontaneous musician Ive ever seen. Ambient backgrounds, looping, all kinds of instruments. The overall sound produced was just magical. It lasted around 1 and a half hour. It just felt like a whole lifetime. It was simply amazing. I had an amazing time clicking pictures also, though the lights kinda sucked and there was too much noise in the photos that I clicked but it was just perfect. Okay, im done. 


Some of my favorite pictures out of the ones that I clicked :-

Every gig has the Random Gig Girl. ;)

For all the pictures, If you're on facebook :- http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.10150481401234903.429777.621559902&type=3

Ps - And That's When He Fell In Love.

I've never felt so weird about a girl ever in my life. Im confused as to what I want. I want to be in a relationship. but I cant afford a relationship right now. Its the time in life when I have to STUDY. Uggghh. -.- She's in 12th. She has her boards in 4 months. Its like the biggest thing for her. She studies the whole time. Wait, she HAS to study the whole time (she's in science). So obviously, she cant afford a relationship right now as well. And secondly, she doesn't believe in relationships. I also started thinking the same. For a long time I was sure that I do not want to be in a relationship for a long time, but now I'm confused. Right now, I won't be able to give time to a relationship, but with her, I want to. Then again, she made me believe that general hook ups with friends is healthy and not that emotionally risky. That also sounds good to me, but somewhere I just feel THAT can never happen. Thats just going to fuck everything up. Our friendship, everything. Its like always. Its perfect right now. Flirting with each other, long phone conversations, long Skype calls. Its what I always wanted. But then I get emotional, yeah I'm a REALLY emotional person. I mean she helped me out with SO much over the past 6 moths that I've known her. She's like my brooo but at the same time I really really like her. Its so fucking confusing. Ive never been this confused, ever. Theres like a million thoughts going through my head, an everlasting puzzle. I have no idea what I'm going to do. I'm not ready for anything right now. Sadly. :P Its too confusing. AAAAAHHHHH!!!!! :( I respect what her ideals are, I really really expect them. But then my heart decides to fuck with me. WHY? When for the first time I want to think with my mind, my heart is taking over AGAIN. Man, I need to read more of Psychology to get a hold of this situation. STOP BUNKING PSYCHOLOGY CLASSES NOW! NOW!! 

Ps - And that's when he fell in love. 

I really like this photo. :)

Playlist for November

My current playlist that puts me to sleep. :P

1. Porcupine Tree - My Ashes (Fear Of A Blank Planet) 

2. Porcupine Tree - The Sound Of Muzak (In Absentia)

3. Textures - Reaching Home (Singularity) 

4. Porcupine Tree - Open Car (Deadwing) 

5. Trivium - Forsake Not The Dream (In Waves)

6. Trivium - Of All These Yesterdays (In Waves)

7. Porcupine Tree - Deadwing (Deadwing)

8. Korn - Narcissistic Cannibal (The Path Of Totality) 

9. Porcupine Tree - Arriving Somewhere But Not Here (Deadwing)

10. Imogen Heap - HIDE AND SEEK!!!! <3 

2011. :)

Yeah theres still 41 more days to 2012 but what the fuck? :P 2011 has been a year that has changed almost EVERYTHING in my life. Till 10th, I used to have this life I lived, like a fixed life. As soon as I went into 11th, it changed. 2011 has to be the most eventful year ever. SO MANY FUCKING THINGS HAPPENED IN THIS YEAR! :O Now, Im going to try my best and recapitulate the most eventful things of the year. And well, i shall add the others after a month and a half. 

-> 29th January - Siddhant and I had a combined 16th Birthday Party at Tabula Rasa. IT WAS EPIC! But yeah, now when I come to think of it. 16th Birthday Parties are sooooooo overrated. :/ Now it just sounds stupid to do that kind of a party again.

-> Sometime In March - Passed 10th grade with a fairly decent CGPA average of 8. :P 

-> Sometime in March - Fought with my dad and took Humanities instead of Science (If I were a science kid, I wouldn't have been blogging at all). Basically stood up for what I wanted to do, and my mother gave me her upmost support in the decision I took, and so did Dad, finally. :P 

-> 11th April - Officially entered 11th grade and became an Arts/Humanities student. Met knew people, in a totally new class. :) 

-> Sometime in April - Got my heart broken. Bad. Very Bad. :/ 

-> Sometime in April - Made new friends, recovered from a broken heart. New found likeness for a lot of girls. 

-> 4th May - Wrote my first blog titled 'Dead Seeds'. Thought of creating a story based blog. Gave the names and title of the blog according to the Wrath album by american metal band Lamb Of God. 

-> Sometime in May - Switched to playing bass for my band. Penguin Park was born. I guess it was May. :P And well, SUMMER HOLIDAYS STARTED! No Holiday Homework for the first time felt heaven! Caught up with old friends, felt great! :D 

-> 23rd May - Soundwavez 2011. Performed on the Annual Parikrama School Concert after 2 years. WHAT AN AMAZING FEELING IT WAS! Played in undoubtedly the best self composition I've even been involved in. Sidharth Gupta and Siddhant Seth are the BEST! Whatta Night it was! :D That was the moment when I really felt alive!

-> 24th May - Made a new 'special friend'.

-> May end - Got my Download Festival 2011 tickets confirmed! :D 

-> 8th June - Left for London, United Kingdom

-> 9th-10th-11th June - Attended the DOWNLOAD FESTIVAL! FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK! THATS A BIG BIG FUCKING CHECK ON MY BUCKET LIST! SAW THE BANDS THAT I JUST KEPT STARING AT ON YOUTUBE! IN FRONT OF MY FUCKING EYES! I could go on about this forever. IT IS STILL UNREAL!

-> Sometime in June - Finally got over the one who broke my heart. Felt really different. Felt free. 

-> Sometime in June - Got close to the 'special friend'. She just made me laugh and smile whenever I had any problem. She is just great. 

-> July, August, September - Period of so called "Depression". Started feeling very negative about everything. I REGRET ALL OF IT. :/ 

-> Sometime in July - Got the news that Metallica would be playing in India later in the year! And thats when you faint. 

-> Early September - Maduli's party. THE SHIZZZ! :D 

-> September - Fucked up exams. :P September was Metal month. Trivium, Dream Theater, Textures, blah blah blah - ALL RELEASED THEIR NEW ALBUMS! 

-> 5th October - Trip to Maldives. The most relaxing holiday ever. WENT SCOOBA DIVING! ANOTHER CHECK ON MY BUCKET LIST! :D Saw the most amazing aquatic life and swam in the most beautiful waters! 

-> 13th October - First gig ever with my band Penguin Park at the Manajsa, Hauz Khas. ANOTHER CHECK  ON MY BUCKET LIST! :D AMAZING GIG! AMAING FUCKING GIG! A REAL DREAM COME TRUE! THANKS TO ALL THE 70 + PEOPLE WHO CAME TO SEE US! AND A SPECIAL THANKS TO OUR CLOSE FRIENDS AND FAMILY WHO CAME TO SUPPORT US. :) 

-> Sometime In October - Fell in love. Self explanatory.

-> 27th October - The best Sleepover ever! Anxious to watch Metallica the next day. Singing Nothing Else Matters along with 15 other friends! FUCK! WHATTA NIGHT IT WAS! :O :O :O All the anxiousness, curiousness. Finally we were going to see the GODS OF METAL. OUR BIGGEST DREAM WAS GONNA COME TRUE!

-> 28th October - Reached the Metallica venue at 8:30 in the morning. Waited till 4:30 for the gates opened. And then things got fucked up. Easily the WORST DAY OF THE YEAR AND ONE OF THE WORST DAYS IN MY LIFE! All the people who vandalized the stage of Metallica should DIE. DIE DIE DIE DIE! Not a check on my bucket list. The day that should not have been. :'(

-> 7th November - Left my band. Realized self importance and self respect. I do not regret doing that. I feel much more relaxed now. It was as if I was trapped in this void that I always knew would be created. 

-> 9th November - Didn't go for Modern Extacy, my dream music competition. :'( 

-> 11.11.11 - Nothing happened. :P I did wish for something at 11:11 at night. I hope that dream comes true! Though Im not ready for it. Its the time I go, Be careful what you wish for coz you just might get it. 

-> 3rd Week Of November - Redemption week. Talked to the only girlfriend I had once after three years. Apologized. Felt really good. The one who broke my heart called me back and said sorry. I didn't know what I was going through then, but then I just got over it totally! 

-> 18th November - Attended my first ever GLOW IN THE DARK Party. Devesh organized it amazingly! :D It was Devesh's party. :P 

-> 20th November - Decided to write this blog. Okay, Im done (LAME). :P 

Another important thing that happened in all this while. This realization. Girls are not an excuse for the shit in you're life. They come and go, but you need to watch out for the one who will stay. Pray the one you love stays. Relationships suck and are useless right now. There's hardly any time remaining in 2011 and Im gonna go into the 12th grade next year and I guess my priorities will be guitar and studies. NO GIRLS, NO RELATIONSHIPS. Its rather healthy to experiment and goof around with friends because it does not involve any emotion. But then it really gets weird if you fall in love, that is something you cant control. :P

Role Models - Steven Wilson

Through the next few weeks or so, Im going to write down a bit about the people that influence me, guide me, and the people that I can look upto in various aspects of life. 

Role Model #1 (irrespective of likeness) - Steven Wilson (Porcupine Tree) 

If you do not know who Steven Wilson is, he is a multi instrumentalist better known for being the lead guitarist, lead singer and founding member of the Progressive Rock act Porcupine Tree. I still remember the first time I heard Porcupine Tree was back in 2009 I guess. Almost the end of 2009, and the first song I heard was Blackest Eyes. I really liked that song. Then my best friend (Siddhant) gave me the whole discography. At first I didn't find the songs that influencing or simply 'feel' songs, but over a period of time, I really started feeling the songs and started relating it to my life. Porcupine Tree is that deep a band and the main man behind the force of Porcupine Tree is Steven Wilson. The psychedelic ambience and the fact that he combines mellow songs which have the extreme heavy parts and can suddenly go all silent and make you go, HOW THE FUCK DID HE DO THAT? Its like everything is in a flow, its constant. I was too into metal at that time, and it was really hard to make something which was soft and heavy at the same time. It was either soft, or heavy - and soft I did not like. :P 

And then the lyrics. OMFG! I have never seen such lyrics in my life. Ive listened to hundreds of bands and seen their lyrics, but Steven Wilson makes it feel as if he's super human. The fact that he's British, makes the lyrics more refined and disciplined so to say. Can I say that? Ironic, Sarcastic, lyrics that have the power to connect with you. They are true, gut wrenching, scary, emotional but in a totally NON-EMO way. 

                              "You think you're smart, I think you're art

                               We agreed on this. It doesn't work, 

                               Feeling like dirt, feeling like you don't care 

                               We get a room, and in the gloom

                               She lights a cigarette. Clothes on the bed

                               Love me she said, I lose myself to her."

This is the second verse from the song 'Open Car' from Porcupine Trees' album Deadwing. I mean, the meaning I derive about these lyrics is the fact that say a person just had sex with this girl, and then he felt bad about it afterwards because maybe that person has someone he truly loves. And it may be the weirdest subject to write a song on, but these lyrics just make you sink in and feel as if you were that person. 

                                "God is freedom, God is truth

                                 God is power, God is proof

                                 God is fashion, God is fame

                                 God gives meaning, God gives pain."

These are lyrics from the song 'Halo' again from the Deadwing record. Self explanatory. You actually question your beliefs about god and what god really is. Its scary after a certain point, and the song also has these ambient alien kind of noises that again kind of scare you if you're listening to the song late at night. :P Amazing Stuff. 

And then theres the WHOLE "Fear Of A Blank Planet" album. The lyrics deal with two typical neurobehavioural developmental disorders affecting teenagers in the 21st century: bipolar disorder and attention deficit disorder, and also with other common behaviour tendencies on youth like escapism through prescription drugs, social alienation caused by technology, and a feeling of vacuity product of information overload by the mass media. In an interview with Revolver magazine, Wilson described the main character of the story as "...this kind of terminally bored kid, anywhere between 10 and 15 years old, who spends all his daylight hours in his bedroom with the curtains closed, playing on his PlayStation, listening to his iPod, texting his friends on his cell phone, looking at hardcore pornography on the Internet, downloading music, films, news, violence..."

After listening to a LOT of Porcupine Tree, and well not being successful in making heavy metal songs (trying out different genres like Djent, Metalcore, Progressive Metal), the music of Steven Wilson influenced me to make some mellow stuff and well, combine it with the heavy stuff. I was not expecting it to work out, but surprisingly it did. The way I felt in life, I could finally get it out onto my lyrics, I could finally make my guitar talk. It was a feeling so sublime, that I couldn't stop playing. :P Im working on two songs at the moment with a sort of a mellow touch. My peers seem to appreciate them more than my other Metal songs. :P And personally, I also feel more confident about those songs. First maybe I was thinking of buying a 7 string Ibanez, but now I guess ill settle for a nice PRS Custom SE. :P 

Again, don't know Steven Wilson?  Listen to Porcupine Tree (ONE OF MY FAVORITE BANDS). Listen to his solo records. Watch his film - "The Insurgentes" You'll get an insight into a real complex but focused person. He has his views on things set, theres nothing that can change them. His music is about all the things that people lament about, and the various problems that exist in todays society. Its amazing. Absolutely amazing. 

As a player, his solos are mind boggling - psychedelic, not the usual shred solos. Solos with emotions. His riffs are heavy as fuck, and his chord voicings and vocal lines are just soothing to the heart. Its like you yearn for the knowledge that you can get from his music and playing. 

Respect.

Lomo is the shizzz!

Lomography is the commercial trademark of Lomographische AG, Austria for products and services catering to the Global Modern art community of Lomographic photography. The name is inspired by the former state-run optics manufacturer LOMO PLC of Saint Petersburg, Russia. LOMO PLC created and produced the 35 mm LOMO LC-A Compact Automat camera — which became the centerpiece of Lomography's marketing and sales activities. This camera was loosely based upon the Cosina CX-1 and introduced in the early 1980s.

Ten golden rules of LOMOGRAPHY

1. Take your camera everywhere you go.
2. Use it any time – day and night.
3. Lomography is not an interference in your life, but part of it.
4. Try the shot from the hip.
5. Approach the objects of your Lomographic desire as close as possible.
6. Don't think. (William Firebrace)
7. Be fast.
8. You don't have to know beforehand what you captured on film.
9. Afterwards either.
10. Don't worry about any rules.

Lomography caught my attention because it was something totally different. The exposure of colors, lens flares and all that good old vintage look looks so different and progressive. Its hard to define and you can come up with something unique every time. So thats a new on my wish list. A lomography camera. Yeah. :P 

:D

Some Lyrics, Thoughts

Some lyrics which I have written over the past couple of months for my band (Penguin Park). These  lyrics are for our second song that we are working on (Working title Poptarts aka Song 2). 

I took the inspiration of writing these vocals from the point of view of Genocide and basic suffering any man can face in his lifetime. It starts of with him explaining his situation, trying to fight while constantly being suppressed by the ones who inflict pain upon him. He prays for god to take away all his pain and misery because he has already lost a lot and wants to be free and live a new life. After a ruthless struggle, he loses his patience and in the end resorts to his faith and says that there is nothing he can do to defeat fate, but he is in content that he tried his level best to survive and fight back. 

Verse 1 :- 

(War) Take me to die in this war of hate 

(Fate) Deliver unto my sins 

Forget the past, you may just not last 

(Forced) I am forced to kill the very thing I love 

(Lust) Fall to the hands of this sacrifice 

Lose it all

Chorus :- 

Take away, this misery

What Ive lost cannot be found

We disciples will slowly fall

From the skies where we once belonged

OR (last 2 lines)

Resurrected, your god is safe

But you're the one who has to fall

Verse 2 :- 

Face the pain, cross the bridge of light 

Fall face first, die of your thirst

Forgive your old sins, crawl to reimburse 

For life and embrace 

The greatest battle of this age

Dark and Grey, the mask hides your face

Fall to the grace, of the fallen slaves   

Ghosts of this land, take over your head

Crush you within, you crumble - YOU'RE DEAD

Chorus 2 :-

Take from me, these memories

Now I now where I went wrong

Its time to rise, in mutiny

Against the darkness of our fate

Ending Vocals :- 

Follow the path, Of Destruction

Silence beckons, feel your infections 

You torture my soul, You destroy my race

You kill the very sense of pain

Please comment and tell me how you feel about them. 

And October comes to an end

A look back at October :-

- Went to Maldives. Amazing time

- Had my first gig with my band (Penguin Park) 

- Got my exam results. Not good. :/

- Diwali wasn't that good compared to last year. Yes, burnt crackers but didn't have that much fun

- Waited in anticipation for Metallica to come to Delhi

- Memorable night stay at Sidharth's house. Highlight being when we sang Nothing Else Matters. Around 14 guys singing together to the live version of the song. Almost cried. 

- 28th October. A date that I will never forget. Reached the Metallica venue at 8:30 in the morning. Stood in line for more than 4 hours, just to see a bunch of cunts destroy my dreams along with the ones of 25000 others.

- Someone surprisingly, unworkably became really close to someone

- Wept for 3 days continuously after the madness at the Metallica concert in Gurgaon

- Sent a letter to Metallica, got a reply. Best feeling ever since the concert.

Overall. October was neutral, started off amazingly but almost ended in a disaster. Though, 28th October will always be remembered as the worst day of my life. 

6th November 2011 - Is this really happening?

Yesterday has to undoubtedly be the scariest night ever. Ive never gone through anything like this. I have been a huge fan of the horror movie genre, and well you always get the chills when you watch horror movies at night and its considered to be an accomplishment or something like that - more like "You have the balls" shit. I would generally get scared at night thinking of classics like The Exorcist and new interesting ones like The Exorcism Of Emily Rose, Grave Encounters, Paranormal Activity etc. I would have dreams as well. They were quite scary, but very superficial. They never felt real. Suddenly, I stopped having dreams for a long time. I don't remember when I last had a dream. This was till yesterday. So after studying, being online, watching videos on youtube and talking to people on the phone, I finally decided to sleep around 2:15-2:30. I put on my new playlist that I made recently and went of to sleep. After sometime I was woken up by a sort of disturbance in my headphones. The candle was still on, I forgot to blow it off before sleeping, thus the room looked kind of creepy. I decided to stop the music (now that I was actually quite sleepy) and just put the headphones and the laptop aside. After a short period of time, I started hearing weird noises. It wasn't the usual sound of the fan. No it wasn't the windows making noise because of the wind like every other night. It was as if I was hearing sounds which you would rather hear in a Porcupine Tree song with a dark and heavy feel. Somewhat like Deadwing mixed with Halo and So Called Friend. 

It was scary. And suddenly, it was as if I heard someone scream from a distance. I tried to get up, but my body won't move. It was as if there was a huge boulder above my body and It was getting hard to remove it. Finally I moved my body, or basically got up. I checked the time, It was 2:28. I thought as if more than 30 minutes passed by, but it was just a matter of 5-10 minutes. I was like, man I'm dreaming again. Phew, I have to go to sleep. After sometime, I heard the scream again. That was when I got scared. I rushed to remove my blanket and just step out of my room, but the blanket would just never end. I kept pulling it, and it would never end. Confused, I let it be. It was still pulling towards my direction. I chose to ignore it and tried sleeping. Then suddenly the Tv opened on its own. As far as I remember, it was a medieval themed surrounding, knights, war, long and dark colonies at night. Again my body won't move. The candle was still illuminated. Finally I got up. I was really scared. But then, something scared my even more. When I eventually got up, the candle was blown off. I grabbed my blanket and pillow and ran out of my room. I went and banged my parents' room and ultimately slept there (Im not ashamed of it, I was scared - that was the safest place that came into my mind). I kept hearing things while leaving the room also. Im really scared of sleeping today. Really really scared. I have no idea how Im going to sleep tonight. Man.