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Saturday, April 28, 2012

Light It Up

Pot. These three letters have changed almost everything. In the last 4 to 5 months, these 3 words have changed my life, my friends, my interests, my decisions - almost everything. These three words have helped me stand up for myself and fight. These three words made fly and feel almost weightless. These three words have got out the worst in me, but at the same time have helped me calm down. I do not get high because everyone does it or its cool to do weed and shit and stuff. I just get high because it helps me relax, it helps me concentrate and it helps me to think more deeply. When the senses seem to fade away, this shit kicks in and boosts your mood up. This is not a justification as to why I smoke up, but just an answer to society. Smoking weed is a bad thing. I don't even consider weed to be a drug because it grows naturally. The governments cannot legalize it only because it grows naturally and they won't be able to tax it. Its much better than drinking alcohol and getting all sloshed and so not in your senses. This shit makes you feel the unfeelable (if that word exists - meaning something which has personally never been felt before). It doesn't harm your body - YES, IT DOES NOT. Its way better than cigarettes and again - It makes you feel ohh so better! ;) Do it once or twice a week and you're cool. Keep a time gap between your joint so that you feel something new every time. Getting baked is good, not bad. You just need to do your research, know where to know from, for how much to score, what to score, to identify what you scored. And the last and the first thing that you need - learn how to roll a good joint. Ohh, you can practice with tea leaves if you have like time to waste but make sure that joint looks beautiful. Or in the words of the great Bob Marley - "If you're naughty, you can smoke it in a bong." Its better if you buy a glass bong but making a ghetto bong out of household appliances isn't bad either. Though this is like open information to everyone - you should not tell people you don't know and trust that you smoke up. Its how society is, they start perceiving you in different ways. So you should know people who are cool with it and if you are lucky enough - you're friends will also love what you're doing. And then you'll have the night stays and the long hours in the washroom sitting in a hotbox and laughing like jackasses. There is so much more to pot than just its criticism. Just don't do anything more than that, coz thats when shit gets heavy. I can, right now say that I will never do stuff like cocaine or heroin ever in my life. And everyone does this shit. You may not even you, your neighbor must be booming every night without anyone knowing. Somehow the magic is the moment when you get high and no one knows that you're high. On the other hand, being high with people is a lot of fun. You somehow connect much more easily. You do not see things, your senses just become more powerful. Music becomes thousand times better, food becomes thousand times tastier. Have anything, you'll feel as if you're having caviars or pizzas. And remember one thing, don't change yourself. You are the same person that you were before, nothing has changed. You just indulge in recreation activities, thats all. Don't care about the people who try to make you stop because you also know you can't do it. Do not feel embarrassed or different from other people, you have no time for their bullshit and be happy with the decision you've made. What you do inside your closed room is nobody's business. If you're happy, get high! You'll feel happier! If you're generally sad and depressed, get high! You'll laugh like you've never laughed before. Spread the love, share the emotion. Because the grass will always remain green. ;) 

Ps :- Im so stoned right now and this shit is so funny. I don't care what people have to say about me. :P 


Thursday, April 19, 2012

Deadmen

Would anyone like to share? You, back there? Who, me? Really? Do I really need to share? Or am I fine just hiding all my emotions and thoughts inside? I never knew there this blog would go when I started off. I really didn't know. At one time, it was a necessity. I couldn't sleep without writing something. And look at today - Its been a long time since I've even thought of writing something. Everything has changed so dramatically. Whatever had to happen, has happened. All the heavy and deep stuff is sort of over. For now. Things are currently boring. I surely have calmed down a lot, ill thank the pot for that, but I'm kind of bored with that as well. The only word that can come to my mind is awkward. I don't know why I can't control my dirty perverted thoughts when it comes to people. Im sure they are pissed with me about that. Im somehow really irritating people these days. Its maybe because I'm generally irritated myself. 

I really don't know. Ive lost interested in songwriting. Ive lost interest in doing anything that involves deep thinking or extensive work of the mind. I just don't know why. I really don't know what I want. If I really look at it, I guess I can just call a very small bunch of people my real friends. Somehow people make it so obvious that they don't like my presence or sometimes even my existence. Seriously man, if you have the guts - just tell me! You have a problem with me? Talk to me about it? Don't discuss it with other people. Don't try to spoil the other persons view point about me. I don't have any problem with you, I don't go around saying stuff about you do I? Or should I also start doing that? Sorry, I won't go down to that level. You never really care about me, but when you find out that I smoke - you give me an hour long lecture telling me to quit. Why? Why the concern all of a sudden? Sometimes, I really don't get people man. I have so many questions that are unanswered, unexplained. I really don't get how other humans work, why they work in such fucked up ways. Fuck, I'm just being true. Is it just hard to withstand something which is simply true? I guess that has been the problem all along, accepting the truth. Standing for what is right, standing for what is true. I guess that is where people fail. I guess thats where I prosper and I guess that is the reason I feel alone right now. There is just a lack of people who appreciate my existence. Im not saying that I mind that fact, but I would like things to be back to how they used to be. I want people to get back to being good. I want people to get back to being true, back to accepting the truth. 

Everyone are just like Deadmen, just a physical body - no soul. It really saddens me. Okay, you fucked up. Say sorry man, Id give you another chance. Stop being fucking EGOISTIC! Because of you and your changing attitude, trying to change me - I've been contradicting myself quite often these days. And I don't appreciate that. I have no intensions of falling in love, I have no intensions of connecting with anyone on a deeper level. Though I would still love the company of the geisha long lost and forgotten. She may be the one who comes and rescues me with her art and her aura. I just hope she somehow connects with my art, my soul and makes me feel something different. Feel the vibration, feel the bells toll. But do you really want to go down the same path again? 

One confused little boy. He is 17 now, but still has no idea what live has  in store for him. He is eager. He wants to know, he would go to any depths to find his answers. Until then, he waits patiently. He stares at the clouds and waits for the rain to fall on his face again. He waits for the sun in the morning to rise and give his life a new beginning. She wants the moon to glitter at night and make his life worthwhile. Even going into different worlds doesn't help. The pot is over for sometime now, and so is his song. Until then, he waits patiently. 


Sunday, April 1, 2012

"Another Chapter, Laid To Rest"

There it is. The end of another chapter in my life. If I see how this has been emotionally and socially, I’ve almost lost everything at the end. Though, I’m happy for the fact that I at least have some people that I can call my “REAL” friends. I’m also happy because my parents are happy with my effort at the end of this academic year. My year end result wasn’t that good but it wasn’t that bad either, though I personally feel I deserved more. Anyway, except for the never ending emotional confusion that I went through these weeks – they were simply a blast! A road trip with friends, countless night stays, a trip to Goa with just my dad, countless movies, parties, contemplation sessions etc etc. From tomorrow starts maybe the most enduring academic year that I’ll ever face. Class XII. This is it, nothing else matters (thank Metallica for that).

What do I look for is this academic session? I just hope I find more people whom I can trust and who actually give a shit about what I think. I’m not looking for love, but if it comes and knocks me at my door – I won’t mind giving it another try, I just won’t get deep if that’s possible? I just hope I get good marks in my boards so that I can apply to the UK and get accepted into maybe Cambridge or Oxford. I know it sounds huge, but I believe that I can do it. What the hell? Seriously, I’ve been through tougher shit before in my life. My Solo EP is delayed, now I'm looking at say end of June. I really don’t know if I’ll be able to stretch it more than that, I just hope I finish it by June. Am I looking for a band? No. I really don’t want to be in a band right now, I don’t think I’ll be able to contribute that much and I really can’t afford to deal with altering egos at this moment. Finally signing up for guitar classes tomorrow, really stoked for Soundwavez 2012 (The annual concert of Parikrama School of Music). I plan to record more bands in the coming months. I really want to do a lot but unfortunately I have really less time. I don’t think I’m doing anything else after July than studying, except for my Grade 8 guitar exam.

I just hope that I end up at the better place after March 2013. What I cannot afford is another emotional set-back, not that I’m scared of one – but I really am fed up of just getting into a compromising position. Anything else? I guess this is the 100th time I’ve heard Unforgiven 2 in two days. God, how can you not love Metallica? Fucking Genius. I’m soon going to write about James for sure. That is long overdue, and yes yes – I shall click more this year! I went to a Think Floyd Gig the other day at Hard Rock and really got some good pictures. And to finish up, I hope I’m keeping this blog entertaining and realistic at the same time. Though I’ve not yet received a single comment, I won’t back down because I like what I’m doing here. :D

"Sincerely, Fuck Off"

Not that I care, but why should I blame myself? God! You really need to keep that ego in check. -.-
Bye.